For a Reason!

Through my Pilates studies and training, I have had the opportunity to meet and work with many wonderful teachers and mentors. About six years ago I began following one particular Instructor and really gravitated to his approach to Pilates. I did an online workshop he offered. He came across as kind, knowledgeable, and compassionate. His style and mine when it came to designing a class were in sync.  

I started watching as many of his videos as I could find and also watching videos of those who had trained with him. He offered the chance to do a Masters Program in Pilates and I knew this was what I wanted to do. It was not without cost and a heavy cost at that. The training would take place across the country in multiple sessions meaning multiple flights and hotels. The training alone was $10,000.  The timing and the costs were both making this not something I could do right away but something I intended to work towards. It was my future. I just knew it.

Several months later in that same year, I attended my annual Pilates conference and low and behold this Pilates God was teaching a workshop! Here was my chance to have my first in-person experience that could hold me over until I could attend the master's training. 

I arrived early so I could get a spot up front. I didn't want anyone blocking my view. I was so excited and ready to learn. Unfortunately, my excitement quickly turned to disappointment. This instructor picked people from the audience to demonstrate and it was clear these were people he knew ... so no chance I would be picked. Inside comments and jokes about time together previously and work together before was the preface to each person demonstrating an exercise. The instructor used words like 'ugly' to describe movements he didn't like. He was gruff and critical. Not at all the persona I had seen in videos. He remained on the stage apart from the rest of us as we attempted the movements he had his cronies demonstrate. At most workshop, the teacher comes around and checks on the participants, interacting and offering advice. That is what I expected but he did not leave his throne and we were left to wonder and speculate in our small groups if we had it right or not. 

With only five minutes left until the workshop was finished, a few folks discreetly left the room. It's important to note these conferences are huge and sometimes a person may need to get to the other side of the resort to set up for their next presentation. This was not acceptable and the Instructor yelled at all of us! He told the ladies closest to the doors to hold them closed because he said he was being disrespected. He stated he would not stand for this after he gave of his time for someone to leave early and disrespect him. I was so shocked by this outburst and outrage from a person I had believed to be so patient and kind.

I knew after this two-hour workshop I would not be pursuing a master's degree with this man. I was so disappointed but also grateful to have had this experience before I invested lots of time and money into what I believe would have been a disheartening experience. I realized through this experience that I didn't need the validation of a Master's and I had several other wonderful mentors who have always welcomed me with open arms and acceptance and taught me so much!

So why am I sharing this story with you? I am sharing this because right now many of us are facing disappointments and let downs. Events or experiences we were looking forward to are not happening. Businesses we liked are closed. Maybe some businesses we liked have acted in ways that have shocked, saddened, or disappointed us during this pandemic. Maybe others have surprised us with their generosity or support or kindness. Regardless we have had expectations that haven't been met. I am sharing this because sometimes we think we know exactly what we want and need only to be surprised to realize either we already have what we need or something else will do just fine if not better. I am sharing this to let you know there may be disappointments but if you look around you may find new opportunities as I did that were better opportunities for me in the long run. If we linger in the disappointment, we may never realize what else is out there.